Whomever said you couldn't find love after 40 must have been looking in all the wrong places. On July 20, 2004, I married the most wonderful man, Steve Carlock, in a beautiful and private ceremony that was a far cry from my first wedding 22 years before in which 830 guests filled the church and witnessed my father "wheel" me down the aisle (he was in an accident just days before and had to be brought to the church by ambulance and in a wheelchair). Perhaps it was an omen of things to come, but when my father first gave me away, my bridal veil got caught in the wheel of his wheelchair, pulling my entire body away from the groom who my father was supposed to be giving me away to!
I look back at my first wedding now and chuckle, as who would have thought I'd end up marrying again, but without all the fanfare and hype that my first wedding had. Back then, I had 12 bridesmaids and a beautiful gown that took my mother and me months to pick out. That gown cost 4-figures and took me three hours to put on. This time around though, I went to the mall after work the night before my second wedding - and picked out an outfit that cost no more than $25! The next day, in fact, I was still putting make-up on at the courthouse where we had to pick up our marriage license before going to the church for the wedding! By no means does this suggest I took my vows with any less seriousness than I did the first time around. Just the opposite. Because this time around, my wedding ceremony was focused on the most important thing of all: the commitment my husband and I made to love one another in sickness and health...and through good times and bad.
In this regard, I believe a bad first marriage can serve as an impetus for positive change. It can force you to learn what to look for the next time around - and what to avoid. Unfortunately, not everyone does this. Out of fear that they'll be alone forever, they jump all to quickly into another marriage - repeating the same mistakes they made the first time around. Thankfully, I've learned from my mistakes, and I'm happy to say I could not be any happier than I am today. No matter what happens - good or bad - I know what it's like to love and be loved in a genuine way.
So, to all those naysayers out there who claim women after 40 have a better chance at getting run over by a car than finding a husband, I'm living proof that it just ain't true - and I've had my share of suitable candidates, but I waited patiently for the right one to come along. And this isn't any kidstuff I'm talking about either - this is the Real Thing, as in True Love, and the Genuine Article...I LOVE YOU STEVE CARLOCK WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL!